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Firewood & Rust

by Mama Gina

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1.
Firewood & Rust © 8/2017 G. LaMonte You’re just a broken wagon wheel, only gone so far Last time you laid down to rest, wound up where you are There ain’t no fixin’ you and you ain’t movin’ on The world still turns beneath you like a song, a sad, sad song You still hear the music, but you can’t make it on your own So, you tune into the universe on some old radio All you get is static in this house that ain’t no home And you wait for someone else to break down real close BRIDGE/CHORUS A feather with no wing, a lyric you can’t sing And you’re missin’ everything that you had before Wheel without a wagon, fire without that dragon You are what you are, and you can’t be anymore A wheel, it ain’t no wheel lyin’ in the dust No comin’ back from this … firewood and rust You’re the heartbreak in that song you wrote That you can’t bear to sing Reminds you of the love you had – you messed up everything Hurts too much to try again, so you ain’t gonna let it Tell ‘em all you settled down … baby, you just settled BRIDGE/CHORUS You’re just a broken wagon wheel lyin’ in the dust No comin’ back from this … firewood and rust
2.
That’s Not the Moon © LaMonte 5/2017 There’s a light in my window that shines like the moon But that's not the moon There’s a flame in my heart that burns just like you But that's not you What does it say when your world fades away And everything that you do Looks like your love but it ain’t And that’s not the moon – That’s not the moon There’s a smile on your face and I can see it from here Baby, that’s not your smile And I know how this goes and we’ll both be alone In a little while What does it say when the colors all fade Till your whole world ain’t nothin’ but blue It still looks like your love but it ain’t And that’s not the moon – That’s not the moon Bridge: That’s not the light I remember – the light that I know The light that shines under your skin Not the feelin’ I felt when I didn’t know Where you ended and where I begin There’s a light in the sky and it looks like the sun But that can’t be the sun Because if it was, you’d think it’d be shinin’ On everyone What does it say when your world fades away And everything that you do Looks like your love, but it ain’t And that’s not the moon – That’s not the moon
3.
Myth Addict 04:56
Myth Addict © LaMonte 10/2018 I’m a myth addict – Tell myself stories Over and over until I believe The facts, they don’t matter It’s the story I’m after I get high on these threads I weave I am a princess runs with dragons I am a kind and benevolent king I am the madman come from the forest I am the wizard who knows everything I am the drunk in the alley so broken And I am the child who does everything wrong Your stories and mine are so sweetly entwined You hear yourself in my songs I’m a myth addict – Tell myself stories Over and over until I believe The facts, they don’t matter It’s the truth that I’m after I get high on these threads I weave I am three sisters in search of their fortune I am the secret that no one can tell I am the fool and uncomfortable laughter I am three witches and I am the spell I close my eyes and I see the faces Remember places that I’ve never been I am the hero and I am the villain And I am the truth that lies in between I’m a myth addict – Tell myself stories Over and over until I believe The facts, they don’t matter It’s the story I’m after I get high on these threads I weave I’m a myth addict threadin’ that needle Twistin’ and turning, blood and bone deep I’m a myth addict – Tell myself stories Over and over until I believe Over and over I’ll make you believe
4.
Can’t Be Your Sunshine © 9/2015 G. LaMonte Slow march of sandhill cranes Summer long drivin’ rain Water stands, ‘cause it’s got no place to go Comin’ storm, clouds will cry I think I may never get dry Old oak limbs hangin’ heavy and low CHORUS And it occurs to me that I don’t love you like the breeze on my skin I think it’s safe to say I can’t love you like this rain – never endin’ Fallen short of every promise that I’ve made I can’t be your sunshine in the shade Water still, like a looking glass One breath, the picture’s gone like that My world is green, but this sky is wet and gray Wind trails, leaves the trees behind Out here no one seems to mind Nothin’ lasts but this constant state of change CHORUS Wish I were solid like the earth at my feet Wish I were constant like the river flowin’ free I said forever, but that’s a long, long time Wish I were made of stronger stuff Yeah, I love you – but that’s not good enough I can’t love you like this forest loves her pine And it occurs to me that I don’t love you like the breeze on my skin I think it’s safe to say I can’t love you like this rain – never endin’ And it occurs to me that I don’t love you like the hawk takes to wing I think it’s safe to say I can’t love you like the winter melts in spring Fallen short of every promise that I’ve made I can’t be your sunshine in the shade And it occurs to me that I don’t love you like the breeze on my skin I think it’s safe to say I can’t love you like this rain – never endin’ Fallen short of every promise that I’ve made I can’t be your sunshine in the shade
5.
To Tell the Truth © 2/2018 G. LaMonte To tell the truth, I didn’t recognize you I just thought you were beautiful To tell the truth, I never meant to stay for more than just one moment One sip of your soul and then I knew To tell the truth, I’m kind of selfish I often take more than I give To tell it straight, you make me want to turn my world around And find a better way to live CHORUS: But when you’re gone, I know I can’t sustain this Honestly, honesty is not my stronger suit So let’s skip the pain and heartache before this all begins This lifetime there’s no time for us To tell the truth I could say we’d be good together Well, you’d be good for me, and I would wear you down Another space and time, we might dream a real forever But baby, right in the here and now CHORUS: But when you’re gone, I know I can’t sustain this Honestly, honesty is not my stronger suit So let’s skip the pain and heartache before this all begins This lifetime there’s no time for us To tell the truth BRIDGE: So leave me to my love affairs that ain’t love And I’ll leave you to a better fate than this I’ll write it on my soul, and somewhere down the road There’s a lifetime with you someday That I don’t want to miss CHORUS: But when you’re gone, I know I can’t sustain this Honestly, honesty is not my stronger suit So let’s skip the pain and heartache before this all begins This lifetime there’s no time for us To tell the truth
6.
Angels 05:03
Angels © 10/2017 G. LaMonte My angels worry me like a stone in my shoe My angels worry me like a stone in my shoe Til’ I get right with them, ain’t nothing I can do My angels worry me My angels lay me down like a bullet in my chest My angels lay me down like a bullet in my chest So weary of this world – just lookin’ for some rest My angels lay me down CHORUS: Now, I can’t fly … I can’t fly … I can’t fly … away I can’t fly … Wish I could fly … I can’t fly … but I can pray My angels hold me fast like a lover in a storm My angels hold me fast like a lover in a storm Might be an angel, too; but, oh, my wings are torn My angels hold me fast My angels carry me when I can’t get off the ground My angels carry me when I can’t get off the ground Someday I’ll fly again; yeah, it all comes around My angels carry me CHORUS My angels carry me
7.
One Thing at a Time © G. LaMonte 4/2018 Pipelines and parking lots grow faster than the trees That are slowly disappearing with the oxygen we breathe She can’t save the whole world – But she scoops them one by one Moving tiny roots on down the road before the backhoes come You can’t do it all yourself – so don’t you even try But you can do one thing at a time They’ve leveled off the hilltops and they’ve stripped the earth right down Once they’ve stolen all they can, they’re off to kill another town He finds himself a broken mountain, buys one acre at a time Hopes to get it all paid off and reclaimed before he dies You can’t do it all yourself – so don’t you even try But you can do one thing at a time One tiny life, on broken wing One hungry soul, one song to sing You can’t do it all Makes you want to cry Oil spills into the gulf and coats the seagull’s wings They’d rather pay the penalties for the profit black gold brings One tiny heart beats in her hands, she scrubs the tar away A hundred more may die tonight, but this one flies away You can’t do it all yourself – so don’t you even try But you can do one thing at a time You can’t do it all yourself – so don’t you even try But you can do one thing at a time Got to do something Yes, you can do one thing at a time
8.
Drift 05:06
Drift © 2/2016 G. LaMonte Slow she rolls – tannin brown Feeds the trees that feed her And when she flows underground And you can’t see her She still eddies, curls Like this ribbon is the gift Slows my soul right down All I wanna do is … CHORUS Drift – gonna stare up at the sky Float lazy like a leaf along the way Sink – gonna drop myself right in Gonna bathe my aching soul, I’m gonna pray Rise – gonna turn and taste the sun And every time my life runs too swift Gonna make my way down the Santa Fe Pour myself in and drift Bend my knee like cypress Take my time to grow Feel the water wash over me Watch the manatee roll Might lift my head and dry my wings And close my eyes a bit Don’t need to do much of anything All I wanna do is … CHORUS Drift river - Sink river - Rise river – Drift CHORUS
9.
Where the Long Peas Grow © LaMonte 2018 I drew my first breath here This is where the world begins The trees they are my body Her branches are my limbs I’ve walked every step of riverbank In times of drought and flood The water of this land is my blood We thought to share this river They thought it theirs to keep We fought to hold our homes here They killed us in our sleep They sold the sky above us And they took the land below And they built upon the riverbanks Where the long peas grow CHORUS I was here before you My body may be gone You can’t chain my spirit And you can’t change my song When all the waters rise again As they all surely will This river will take back Every drop of blood’s been spilled Cypress, slaves and phosphate Turned that water muddy brown They turned that mud into gold ‘Til the railroad shut her down Now time has turned her back again And you can find my soul All along the riverbank Where the long peas grow CHORUS I drew my first breath here This is where the world begins The trees they are my body Her branches are my limbs I’ve walked every step of riverbank In times of drought and flood The water of this land is my blood Time has turned her back again And you can find my soul All along the riverbank Where the long peas grow I drew my first breath here This is where the world begins
10.
Due North 04:18
Due North (c) G. LaMonte 10/2015 You traced my shape upon your stars Wrote my name in your sky Pointed me due North So you could find your way on the darkest night You honored me - Begged me shelter Stretched me like canvas – Wore me like cloak To your warrior’s art, I played my part And I fell in the dance to his spear in one stroke Your children – my cubs We lived with each other and that was enough Took what we needed - But we never took more Until your lights burned brighter Than the stars in your sky And now due North’s forgotten And now there is slaughter … and now there is war A war I have no heart to wage It seems you have no heart at all And so, due North, your compass fades And I am just some trophy for your wall Honor lost, collecting dust A relic tossed aside – have you no soul? The wounded – the abandoned cubs And no one counts the stars that fall Your children – my cubs We lived with each other and that was enough Took what we needed - But we never took more Until your lights burned brighter Than the stars in your sky And now due North’s forgotten And now there is slaughter … and now I’m no more Just some stars in your sky … pointing due North I’m just some stars in your sky – pointing due North I’m just some stars in your sky – pointing due North I’m just some stars in your sky
11.
Waking Panther G. LaMonte (6/2013) Waking Panther gently from his sleep Waking Panther gently from his dream He once walked this sacred ground Now his footsteps are nowhere found Waking Panther gently from his sleep Waking Panther gently from his dream Ask the Heron, ask the Crane Ask the Sparrow, call his name Ask Coyote, ask Brown Bear Ask Gator, call him here Waking Panther gently from his sleep Waking Panther gently from his dream Ask the wind, ask the wind, ask the wind, ask the wind We are waking Panther gently from his sleep We are waking Panther gently from his dream He once walked this sacred ground Now his footsteps we pray are sunward bound We are waking Panther gently from his sleep We are waking Panther gently from his dream

about

Heartbroken and homesick, what does a girl do but write songs that she can't bear to sing? And then she sings them; shares them with you in the hope that, as the great Spider Robinson says, "Pain shared is lessened."

Truthfully, Firewood and Rust is my most vulnerable work ever, and reflects love that was never love and a longing for the old Florida where I grew up, and maybe never existed anywhere except in my mind, after all. This is how I process, so welcome to my therapy session! Please join me as I uncover all these faulty memories. Perhaps you will find your story in here. Perhaps you will find healing, as well. I have.

credits

released March 24, 2020

All songs written and performed by Gina LaMonte

Sax on To Tell the Truth by Rachel Welch

Due North additional vocals by Kat White Star; percussion & bass by Claire Franklin; recorded & mixed at Blue Triangle Studios, Sarasota, FL by Claire Franklin, and first appeared as a track on the collaborative The Green Album

Waking Panther reccorded, mixed and mastered at Rising Sun Studios, Tampa, FL by John Seda, and first appeared as a track on The Undertaker's Daughter

Graphic Design by Jesse Guggino

Big love to Betsy and Thor for showing me what I could do with a little gear and a lot of inspiration. Thanks to Tina Miller Jesko and family for opening up their home and allowing me to take over the living room, front porch, and back yard for a month, where we recorded the first draft of this music.

Thanks Universe for breaking me emotionally, physically, financially, and spiritually these last four years. I got a fine collection of songs out of it.

www.mamaginamusic.com

(c) G. LaMonte 2020

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Mama Gina Tampa, Florida

Award winning singer/songwriter & wanderlust ... fearless story-telling ... bluesy vocals ... humor ... straight-ahead, rhythmic, 12 string acoustic guitar ... djembe ... frame drums ... all weft and warp of the soul of this bard

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